A Mother's Guilt

Alaina is home sick today – with a stomach bug.  I got a phone call shortly after dropping her off at daycare that she had thrown up 3 times already.  I called Palmer and sent him to pick her up and he is staying home with her today.  But there is that gnawing in my gut that I should be there with my little girl.

 

I called to talk to her, hoping to offer some comfort, but instead I received the guilt.  Her little sad sick voice saying “Mommy, I need you. I really really need you.”  L 

 

I know Palmer is completely capable of taking care of her and offering her comfort.  But caring for a sick child is a task that I have a hard time relinquishing.  The babes always want their momma when their sick. 

 

If it wasn’t for so much work to do, and having missed so much time here in the last month or so, I’d be home with her.  But I just can’t justify leaving work when she has a parent there already to care for her.

 

Man, I’m bummed.

 

Alaina's First Dentist Visit

On Monday morning, Alaina had her first ever visit to the dentist.  Let me say, I was uberly amazed at how incredible she was.  I never expected this wild child of mine to be so calm and relaxing and completely comfortable with the whole experience.

 

Paige had prepped her the day before, by telling her they would clean her teeth with a little tool that made a “zzzzzz” sound.  So, Alaina had said – I’ll cover my ears!  Paige assured her it wasn’t loud at all. 

 

Paige and I were also getting our teeth cleaned, and I assumed Alaina would want to watch one of us go first so she could see what it was like – but nope!  My little girl wanted to go first.  She was so eager.  She got up in the chair and relaxed when they leaned her back.  The hygienist showed her all the tools and Paige wasn’t the least bit intimidated.  She got to pick out some purple sunglasses to wear so the light wouldn’t bother her eyes. 

 

She did everything she was told – opened wide, sucked the straw, held still…. EVERYTHING!  Paige and I sat there in utter amazement with big smiles on our faces.  The hygienist said she’d never had a 3 yr old act like Alaina.  She thought she acted more like her big sis.  Very proud moment. 

 

I’ll have to remember for next time, if we are all getting cleanings to have Palmer come along and take Alaina home when she is done, as she did get rather antsy.  The hygienist was nice enough to give her a bagel with cream cheese when she began complaining of being hungry.  And when I got my teeth cleaned, Alaina climbed up and laid down on my stomach.  She propped her chin in her hand and watched intently at the work going on in my mouth.

 

Overall – a wonderful and unexpected first dentist visit! 

 

I LOVE Barack Obama!

This morning as I watched my little Alaina walk up the stairs to daycare, I had this overwhelming love for the country she will grow up to know.  She will never be a child that will question her ability to become president - if she chose that path.  For as long as time, a black child never really felt like they could grow up to be president.  Now the day is here where that is a valid dream for the millions of black children in our country. 

Speaking of Alaina - tonight when I turned on the ball - I pointed to the screen and said "who is that?"  Alaina yelled "Arack Abama!"  I said "Yes - He is our President!"  Her response - "Yes!  He is OUR President!  He is my President.  He is Betty's President.  He is Paige's President.  I LOVE Arack Abama!"  

I watched the swearing in this morning at a bar/grill around the corner from my job.  I got their early and got a good seat and was soon joined by a crowd of people, pulling up chairs, standing in rows.  I shared this experience with two friends a crowd of strangers.  It was just as it should be.  

Today is a monumental day.  Not just for our country, but for me personally.  I do believe this is the first day of my life that I have ever felt patriotic. I'm proud to be an American.  I'm proud to be a part of a country full of amazing people who are all so eager to work hard towards a better future for our country.   

Memories of Grandma

Today I had the pleasure of looking through some of Grandma Berts treasures and finding some things that I can keep as a remembrance.  But it is more than a remembrance, it is a connection. I feel the connection to her through the things that belonged to her. 

Here is a summary:

Jewelry - I was thrilled to find a peridot ring, as Grandma and I shared this as our birthstone.  I also found several bracelets, a necklace, and a few more rings.  

Santas - Grandma collected Santas.  My Uncle Mike (#11) and Aunt Debbie started her collection by buying her a new Santa every year from the time they got married.  So, I have two standing Santas.

Butter Dish - This is a vintage (I assume) glass butter dish with lid, that is that beautiful purple/blue iridescent glass.  

Ashtray - This item was actually my Grandpa Bill's.  It is a vintage glass ashtray that was given to him as a gift when he retired. His coworkers all signed it, and wrote "We'll miss you Bill" on it. 

Doll - I brought home a doll for Alaina to play with.  It is plastic, so it is safe with her.  But still she'll have to be careful with it, because it is so old. 

Zipper art - I'd never heard of such a thing, and didn't know that my Grandma used to do this. She took apart zippers, and glued them in a design on a piece of board my Grandpa cut for her. Then she filled in the spaces of her design with colored sand and glitter. It is really cool!  

The Letter 'A' - Since my grandma's name was Alberta, she had a few items with the letter A on them.  These were set aside for my cousin Amber and I to choose from.  I have two pins, one of which actually has a photo of Paige in it when she was a baby; and also a pink hankerchief with an embroidered 'A'.  

So, I now have many items to fill my home with the love of my grandmother.  It was a nice experience, and surprisingly didn't cause me grief.  I was just able to focus on her love and my memories of her as I sorted through her belongings.  I'm so blessed to have had her in my life.